I Will Love You Then

When the hollow is alone

When dust to dust derives from bone

When sparrows sing familiar songs

I will love You then.

When willows weep openly

When long and lost finally meet

When being known is bittersweet

I will love You then

When greater fears are given life

When greater joy is birthed from strife

When a trusted tongue bares a lie

I will love You then

When tears and pain finally cease

When haste is called but listens least

When youthful hearts refuse to beat

I will love You then

When sleep comes to take away

When wearily the last pipers paid

When all that is promised is today

I will love You then

Prompt Writing

Hey Everyone! Recently I have been looking at several websites for writer's and many of them have weekly writing prompts to help spur creativity and generate ideas for writing that might not come so natural. I decided to give one a try and posted my response on writers digest. It was my first try and so I thought I would share it with you all as well. Below is the prompt followed by what I was able to come up with. 

You’re at the doctor’s office for a regular check up when the doctor suggests you get a flu shot as well. You hate shots, so you try to come up with the most outlandish excuse as to why you can’t get one. Start your story with “You’re not going to believe this, but … ” and end it with “And that’s why I can’t get a flu shot today.” (500 words or less)

“You’re not going to believe this, but … ” As the words flew from my lips, my mind took a time out just long enough to be distracted by the heavy bass beat of my thudding heart. At thirty-eight years old, with a beard that would put to shame some of the founding fathers, I was afraid of needles. It was a fear that I had successfully hidden from almost everyone and as I looked at the face of Dr. Jones, I knew it was a fear that I could not publicize now.

         I was digging up a lie from somewhere deep inside when there was a quite but rapid knock at the door that brought me back to the heavily wall papered examination room. An older nurse barely pushing five feet cracked the door just enough to stick in her face and slightly blue tinted hair.

         “Excuse me Dr. Jones, I am so sorry Sir, but can you step outside for a moment?” Dr. Jones nodded a quiet yes, but his facial expression seemed pained. He wasn’t the most pleasant man and seemed to not like surprises, or at least not to like appointment interruptions.

         “Charles, I am sorry for the inconvenience. I will be back as soon as possible.” The Dr. swiftly stood up from his backless stool and walked briskly out the door leaving behind him the scheming mind of a man scared of a simple syringe. As seconds ticked by, each one louder than the last, my anxiety grew and manifested itself into little piles of paper torn from the sheet that was meant to protect the examination table.

         I’d just about decided to leave without explanation, and with no preventative flu shot, when the door opened and in waltzed the doctor once more. I knew that this was my chance to talk my way out of the sharp pointed spike that was determined to penetrate my arm. In a split second I decided to go with one of my go to excuses. I had the speech prepared and was poised to give a convincing soliloquy when the Dr. looked at me with concern.

“Charles, I’m sorry but it seems like we’ll have to schedule you another appointment for another time.” Those words stopped everything around me and I intently waited for him to continue. “It seems the flu is making its rounds quickly this year and we were a little underprepared.” Hope begins to build now and I realize I am holding my breath. “We’re out of the flu vaccine and the next shipment won’t be in until after next week.”   

As I left the examination room and parted ways with the doctor I decided to test my luck and walked right pass the front desk and my chance to reschedule for another day. I was feeling a little lucky and I decided to take my chances and see who would catch me first, if at all, the needle or the bug?

I open the door to my car and smile overhearing another free man’s explanation of his exoneration from the stick. I turn in time to see the little one thirty year’s my junior exclaim, “And that’s why I can’t get a flu shot today!”

A heart full of wishes just holding on for it’s host

Hold on to hope now, it's all that's left at most

She let you down, down, down

She let you down again and again

You are perfect for practice, sweet, strong, and unassuming

And everyone’s worried; a little tension is growing

We see you fall, fall, fall

We see you fall faster than slow

Stronger than last year, you’re looking better for wear

It’s unfair and it’s dangerous for us to be going back there 

You need her gone, gone, gone

You need her gone away from here

Hear that bird lowly singing, and think it’s probably for you

Hear her hum that old tune, and you start feeling it’s true

I pull you close, close, close

I pull you close, and whisper "No"

Welcome Anytime

The rain is beating heavy

You swing on the front porch soaked

A little lonely you sit waiting as you watch the night put on a show

You think the best days are perfect

You watch them come and start to hope

But even the best days are no comfort when they end and you’re alone.

Lightning fills up the vacant sky

Like kindled sorrow fills your heart

Electricity choreographed with thunder and your beating heart just stops

This road keeps getting longer

Inconvenience you swear looks like a 59

But just like these Texas storms we weather you’re still welcome anytime 

The Bird and The Cow

When I was little my daddy told me this tale about a little bird who got pooped on by a cow in the wintertime. Most people would immediately assume that this action was done in malice or disregard but on the contrary the cow actually cared deeply for the bird and was trying to keep the bird warm. After all, it was winter time and very cold. The bird, however, was offended and at the site of a fox approaching who offered to help him out gladly accepted. What the bird didn’t know is that the fox was only offering to help him out of the poop so he could eat him. My dad concluded the story by saying, “not everyone who s***’s on you is your enemy and not everyone that smiles is your friend”.  

            I’ve thought a lot about this story lately and I know that while it is a silly story there is a lot of truth in it. I think any relationship is hard whether it is a friendship, a courtship, family, or a professional relationship. If the relationship is valuable and last long enough there will be good times and bad times. It is part of life and inevitable.

You can’t control the circumstances around you. The cow couldn’t control the weather and neither could the bird. But, you can control the way you look at things. You can control your feelings and thoughts and you can learn to look at people with grace and give them the benefit of the doubt. Extending trust and respect for someone even though you may think their actions to be hurtful I think is key. I think we are all birds at times. Quick to assume and quick to decide what we think is the obvious answer when ultimately there is only one who knows all and whose wisdom is incomparable. Knowing this we should be slow to anger making room for God to work in a way that only he can.

“For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55

We always believe we know what is best for us, but in this case the bird needed protection from the cold and instead of digging to the heart of the cow the bird assumed the worse and went running right into danger in the form of a grinning fox face. His need was met but his perspective wouldn’t allow him to see the overall picture.

Bottom line. If you are struggling with relationships or circumstances you find yourself in don’t be quick to assume the worse when you don’t understand them or their actions. Give people the benefit of the doubt and if you wonder about their motivations or actions simply just ask them. Their answer might surprise you. After all maybe the problem doesn’t lie in our circumstances, relationships, or actions but in our perspective.

As for the cow, I have some words as well. You can’t control the birds in your life. You can’t make them see that you love and you care and you can’t keep them from running to the foxes. You are not God. You are not the Holy Spirit. You are not Jesus. You are who you are, and you are called to love. You are called to have a pure heart and you are called to forgive. You are also called to have grace and mercy. When the birds in your life misunderstand you and when you feel like you’ve done your best and it’s not enough or appreciated it is not time to cut ties, to start a fight, or to judge. It is time to love and pray for them anyways, to be waiting with open arms or a kind word, to be steadfast, faithful and true, and to live in a way that would be honorable to Christ.

Bottom line. If you want to be love to others you have to bear all things, believe all things, hope all things, and endure all things. 1 Corinthians 13 will remind you well.

I’ve been both the bird and the cow as of late. I have been misunderstood and I have misunderstood others. I think as people we generally like to believe we are better than we actually are but God’s word reminds me that my righteousness is found in Christ alone. I hope that my failures will be used to show others just how far God’s grace goes and that in my forgiveness of others I will embody His loving kindness and immeasurable patience.

 1 Timothy 1:15-17

15 The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the foremost. 16 But I received mercy for this reason, that in me, as the foremost, Jesus Christ might display his perfect patience as an example to those who were to believe in him for eternal life. 17 To the King of the ages, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory forever and ever. Amen.